Fun Weekends

Well... At last, finally, a little training for my DotA yesterday. Was on pa (or par?) with Ngiam. Will search for the next match to settle it. But later on when Jun Kit came, I and Ngiam kena God-like from him.. Darn* Went to school also to meet up with teachers... And also some juniors.. Everyone seems to be good and well. I missed out on the new very-"bad"-"rude"-ridiculous Headmistress of my school. Wonder how she looks like.

Oh well.. never mind. Later on, during night time, there was a small gathering in 1 Station (something like that). To my surprise, there are so many people that I know were there also. So many of them. Yeah, got new updates from our friends there. Not bad after all... Later on, I went back to PJ, where I AM now, to prepare for my training on Sunday.

My grading is really near! 8th Oct(Alert...Alert... Faster go do your training!).. Although my Master say I'm doing fine, there's still some sort of uncertainties in me. 2 weeks ahead and I really need a lot of training, stamina type especially to bring me to a higher level. Read Sim Mei's blog and "heard" she might change to medic huh? Great.. Anyway, if you happen to read this Amy, do your best! Don't worry ok? You know you got no problem in maintaining ur CGPA, studies... So, pick the route that you think is right for you ok?

Till then, signing off...

I'm Packed!!!

Well, it's really tiring ya know since my lat traininig here. Coma an think of it, I got a really pack schedule to follow. I gotta go for Taekwondo on Monday, Wednesday(if possible) and Saturday is a must. Then, Thursday night I got Tai Chi & Chi Gong while on Sunday I got Shan Shou in PJ... Wow... it's really pack for me now. I don't know how can I cope with it. Let's hope that God give me extra strength and stamina.. MAN! Stamina! I haven started my training on that, yet! Gone case! My Shan Shou master gonna whip me. LOL..

Well, home sweet home rite? Home is still the best, just that, I'm always the kakak once I'm back here. Although it's tiring, it's enjoyable. I just fought with my brother, as in you know, practice. Haha.. He got a little bit improvement there. Awaiting Wai Loon, and Horng Tat if possible. Saturday! Haha!

Gotta go. Enjoy you schooling days peeps!

Wait a second.... Where's my DotA training?! Man.. another slot... Sh*t... Gotta find some time for it, darn!

"Click"

Hmmm.. It is not as sad as I thought, BUT, it's a very very nice piece! Really.. Although I'm a bit outdated... Still, I watched it! I like the moral of the story. FAMILY FIRST. I"ll do that, all the time. FAMILY FIRST.

Yeah, holiday started and it sucks. Know why? Cause I'm getting FATTER already... It seems to be.. All my effort... all these while... Where can like that?? I must control!!! The best solution is to go back to PJ.. In PJ, no food, as in no free food from parents. Only two meals a day, unlike here back in home, 4 to 5 meals per day? Why so much? Because food is all over the place!!! Sob!

And I started my "training" already today. Wanna beat Wai Loon by the next few Saturday. DotA doesn't seems to be going well also. Keep on " feedin' "... Darn... So many things to do in holiday but I really feel lazy to do anything. That's why I come back rarely also. Home is the place I relax... LOL... Yeah, I know this is a lousy blog... So sien rite? Never mind.

Since "Click" has taught me, I'll do the best for my family for now. Work hard and smart for them! I wanna excel in 3rd semester also! GAMBADE everyone!

Don't Forget Your Umbrella Ya!

Well, it's a bid farewell for him, at least, I think. I rushed back to Klang right after my last paper... He's going to UK again, to continue his studies. Of course, that person is Jun Xue. (Kinda sorry that I couldn't make it for Lily's). Well, people come and goes again rite? We can't force people to stay, nor they can decide if they want to stay some times.

See the title of my blog? It's a phrase that his mother told him a few days continously, when he was a ketot, cute, naive little guy in class. Memories huh?

Anyway, good luck to those who are overseas and to those who are still here in Malaysia, we are good too, aren't we?

Still Don't Want To Surrender???

Dear Lord Finals,


Considering that I've taken down Town of Programming and Fotress of Mathematics, and, I've defeated General Writing For Science, General Public Speaking and Communication, and also General Biology. Do you think that you still stand a chance to win?

Well, I'm pretty sure that you'll still putting your last hope on General Chemistry rite? Sigh, let's forget it and ask General Chemistry to surrender, will ya? I guess not also rite?

Ok, well then. General Chemistry take down will I this Saturday. Time of capture estimated at 1100 hours and Lord Finals, you'll self-declared defeated by the first minute after 1100 hours, which is 1101 hours. I'll be waiting. Till then.


Yours sincerely,

General Buttercup

Friends To Foes

Initially, I was about to post a story. A true story where from friends, they turned into hatred. But in the mid of it, I realised that it's too long for *YOU ALL* to read so I conclude it this way.

It was because some people who are selling-fish, while the other party are trying their best to take care and be there for the other. The care-takers, were very upset and angry with fish-monger because the fish-monger forgo(not forgot) them when initially they planned out everything, prioritising the fish-monger's safety.

Well, as you can see, fish-monger seems to be didn't realise what's happening and he/she eventually sort his/her way out to a problem, forgetting the care-takers. The pain that the care-takers undergo, he/she didn't see it and never knew about it.

See, in our daily lives, we often take things for granted. Some times, when people are about to share their knowledge with us, or any other things else, we like(maybe not all of us), "Aiya, never mind la, me not interested!" Or, when people care for us, we never realise.

But, to me, at least we can do our best to care for the others. We might not even say "Hi" or anything but, it shows when things are being done. From our body language, our speech, our plans. Everything.

It's really sad, to see people from friends turn into foes. Well, life's like this isn't it?

"We never get what we want, we never want what we get. We never have what we like, we never like what we have. Still we live, still we love, this is LIFE" – Anonymous

I hope that we all are able to care for each other, even the people who just walk by around us. We might learn something from them, just in that few miliseconds. I'm still learning too. God bless everyone.

p/s: Hope that you all (those who involved in that case) can get to read this.

Semester Break Is Coming!

Felt so nice, motivated, membara-bara today, thanks to Jun Xue...

To-Do List :

1st : Kick Min Soon's ass when he come back here. (Highest priority)
2nd: DotA with Jun Xue and gang. (Hopefully, and a bid farewell, again for Jun Xue??)
3rd: Training during my semester break.
4th: Fight with Wai Loon.
5th: Learn cooking (Hopefully)
6th: Make my home good.
7th: Get ready for 3rd semester?
8th: Get ready for my San Shou grading.
9th: Find a girl friend? (never mind, lowest priority for now, let which ever her come to me. Lazy to go after you girls for now, at
at least)

Well, you see, I got so many things to do, especially the first in the list (Don't let me see you in Malaysia so early ya, unless you are well prepared). Cooking, hmmm.. making myself more eligible? LOL... Till then... Signing off.

Cool And Hot = Enough & Wake Up Call

It's not like you always be good to me constantly. Yeah, I think, my eyes are opened, finally. Thanks for making me grow, letting me learn. I've learnt a lot from the process. Different lessons compared to the last time.

NEVER TRUST ANYONE SO EASILY. Of course, the anyone means the person that you like.

Yeah, indeed, I feel like a backup battery for you as you still have hope in him, I believe. I don't wish to stay in your shadow anymore. Regardless what you've done to me, I still advise you, he's not that good. You'll regret. Really. How I wish you can see what I'm trying to address to you but you'll never know what is lying deep in my heart.

I wish that you are stronger, and please do open your eyes bigger. He's not worth your waiting. You'll regret, of course, unless he changed. I'm tired. And there goes my "new chapter of life". You not worth my waits also. I've waited long enough. Fooled enough. Played enough by you. Of all the failures I did, you are the only "failure" that make me feel like a real loser! An imbecile who's waiting for nothing. Hope I'm not that stupid anymore after this.

Firstly, I would like to say sorry to people like Kin Wai, who's always there :"Kenny, go go go! Don't let go!". I appreciate your helps a lot but I think it's time for me to end my misery. I would also like to deliver my thanks to people like, Ley Ching, Pauline, Pei Sze, Shwu Woan, not forgetting Manpreet, for being supportive and lead me to an opening. Thanks everyone!

Tired... I'm Tired

Well, first of all, feel like saying "Sorry" to those who are so caring and even dropped a comment for me to refer at. Why am I saying this?

Today once I woke up from my dream, this thing came into my mind : Never mind about the answer anymore. I'm a fool.

That's it and I made up my mind, not to do anything anymore. I'm really tired. Feel like a fool everytime. (Not to boast myself but) I'm thinking that, if she do have feelings towards me, then let her say it. I'm lazy, reluctant to do anything about this relationship. I never know what is in your mind. Tired of guessing.

I had got more things to worry and to do rather than just guessing what is in your mind. Since I was young, I had this in my mind. It's my last resort where, I'll contribute myself to any body/organisation, which needs me if I'm still single at certain of age. Be a bodyguard, soldier at the enemy line, or even send me to the deadliest place on Earth. Besides than my family and friends, I got nothing else to worry anymore. Rite?

You are making me very tired. I'm always hurt. See guys, this is my weakest weakness. Yeah, today it rained. The whole bunch of us want to take our dinner and it was kind of late already. No choice, but we gotta go in the rain with umbrellas. As usual, I'm always the last. I have my umbrella with me. 3 of us was there. The other girl came here and pick up the other girl, left me with her. No choice but to go with her together. I do feel thankful for getting such chance, for letting me to learn. But, so what?

I do hope that you'll release me from this torturing. I wanna live as a free man again.

Confused...

I'm just very confusing now. Very. From one of my friend I heard, they still like each other very much and the guy still call her often. O_o "'

I don't know what am I now. You treat me so well out of a sudden. I'm really confused. Why can't you just tell me or sms me what you are thinking of? I am really really really confused. I don't know what to do. When I was informed that you and him still in touch(which I'm not very sure of) , I realised that I still like you pretty much. I don't know how far can it go.

I was thinking for days, giving her a chance also giving myself a chance isn't it? But now, out of a sudden, this one.

My rational & logic are very clear about everything, except the followings: Why you treat me so good suddenly? Is it that you are treating everyone the same or I'm the only one?

I need the answer. If I can't get the answer in these days, I think I might ask you, but not now. I might. I'm just got stucked in the middle of a seperated path. To go on with the left lane or with the right. I just don't know which to choose. I need that answer to help me to choose it.

I hope to end this kind of feeling fast, either with a happy ending, sad ending, or a new chapter of my life. Either one.

Are Those Just Illusions Or Reality??

I don't know what to do or what to feel. Are you trying to tell me anything? As days passes by, you are giving more body language as well as things that I considered as "hints". I wonder how true are them or they are merely my illusions. I really can't tell them apart!

I am kind of blur with what you had and trying to tell me. Shall I or shall I not to take up the "risk" again? There was once I lost my trust in you but, the feeling (good one) is coming back now. I know you are sad, you bearing the pain that I bore last time. I know it is pain and hurting.

I some how, some what hope that this time the feeling is true, but kinda afraid as well that you might hurt me again. Part of me feel like taking up the "risk", repeat what I asked last time, to you and part of me is really afraid to undergo the same pain again.

My dear readers, I really don't know what to do or what to say. I'm not that kind of person who easily let go a relationship but, at the same time, I'm afraid to start one as well. Help, anyone? Thanks!

*The you here refers to a her*

UM Revisited

*Six hours ago*

"Did I forgot something? Anything that I should do tomorrow morning?"

After thinking for long, I "decided" that nothing is coming up to me in the morning, at least. Bed time!!!

* Timed at 0920*

**National Service theme song on my Nokia 8250**

On the screen, it read " MH "(someone's name).

"Fuck!!!!" This is the first word that I shouted out once I came to my consciousness. Followed by, "WTF???"

I supposed to get a car from my relative, who are studying in UM for Acturial Mathematics at 0900. I overslept. Fuuu... Buttercup can hardly late for any appointment one... There goes my impression, first impression for my relative that Buttercup is terrible!!!! She like waited me for... 20 minutes? Darn... I feel bad. I just simply do some washing and I rushed downstairs to meet her.

Now here's the nice part.

"You know how to go to Stesyen Universiti right?" she asked.

" O_o||| Errr.... I dunno wo... But you can lead me there...", Buttercup replied.

"Hmmmm ok...", sounded a little bit in disbelieve.

"......", I really don't know what to say or what to do. So, I just followed her instructions.

Here I began my HeavenOfBrokenEnglish: Chapter : UM Revisited. Revisited? Have you ever been to UM Buttercup?? Of course I did. Last year December when I was down to PJ alone to settle the documents for my accomodation now, I ended up in UM, dunno-where-am-I-state, with only petrol that can last me for another 20 minutes?? It was scary that time. As you can see, if your car run out of petrol on the road, you'll need mechanic to do something to remove the air in ur carburator and that means $$$. That time, I got no mood at all to enjoy the beautiful compound of prestigious UM.

Now is a different story. I got a guide here and I'm the driver! I drove kinda slow, compared to my normal driving speed, just to savour the ice-cream for my eyes. So beautiful. If only I had a camera. Let me ask you, how many people can ever make it in into UM? Not many right? But I "made" it! Jealous? I bet you "are". Really nice compound with all the pine trees and bla bla bla.

After some 15 minutes, we reached the station. *Sigh of relief *

"You sure you know how to go back?"

"Yeah I guess so, I'll just take the Federal Highway lo. I know there well". (Actually Iknow nothing!!!)

She left me, again, looks like, in disbelieve. Yeah true, I already stayed in PJ for so long and I hardly travel out from my hostel, unless going to UTAR or training in Seksyen 17. Those are the places I go. Pathetic. But, Buttercup is a smart one didn't I? I recognised the road that taxi driver took me back from Mid Valley long long time ago. Used back the same road and I ended up back in MC!!!

To make sure that I really remembered the road, I took a trip again, back to UM and Station Universiti. While I was in the compound of UM, I suddenly realised something that I didn't notice AT ALL. There was a traffic light, near Tunku Chancellor Hall or something like that.

"Shit!!!! Did I just passed by here just now? Did I violet the law? Did I..... Did I.."

All the questions came out. UM don't have traffic police right? I hope. I don't even know if I went through it just now if it was red. God! How can I be so careless????? I drove on. "Ok, stage UM cleared, moving towards stage Stesyen Universiti."

Finally I'm back again, safely, and without a mistake, to my hostel. Hey, who says Buttercup's memory is bad?? I'm good!!!

Secret Reveals

Some truth had been revealed today. I realised how much you had suffered. I'd been through that as well. Seeing you being sad, upset, not realising that it had happened. I thought I think too much.
I'm kind of hurt, seeing you being sad, because of him. I can barely stand it because I feel the pain that you felt. When I heard the truth, my mind went blank. I don't know what to do and what to think. I'm speechless at that moment. I don't even know how I should feel.

Well now, I feel like standing aside, because, I know that, the other him was also informed about this and he's trying to after you. I wish you all the best, and please, don't make the same mistake again. If you hurt, I mostly will feel hurt again.

God bless you, be strong!