Sunday, September 28, 2008

Drive-Thru ATM Procedure, To-be-intro-soon

Now, I've got something from RojakDaily and it's like this:

Drive-thru ATM In Malaysia

There is this bank that is hiring Rojaks n its crews to come out with a set of guidelines on how to use this new facilities they are going to introduce at the end of this year. Of coz since this is a top secret project and we dunwan any other banks to launch before we do so we are not gonna announce the name of the bank which hired us. So stop asking ledi!Anyway, we (me n the geng) interbiuED close to 5000 people both males, females, ahkuas and shamales and after 9 months of hard work we finally came out with a set of policy that is fair for all, including ahkuas and shemale also! Totally no discrimination at all!WE concluded that 2 sets of manual are needed, one for males and one for females as for shemales and ahkuas, its up to them to decide which set is best for them.Here are the proper way showing you how to properly utilise the Drive Thru Atm Machines, without leaving your car.For males, the procedure is kinda simple .. just a 7 steps procedures and here izzit.

MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2 Wind down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Wind window up.
7. Drive off.

For females, their procedure is kinda bit more complicated, please follow this procedure step by step to avoid any complication while using the Drive Thru ATM machine.

FEMALE PROCEDURE:
1 . Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4 Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided.
23. Give appropriate one-fingered hand signal to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 Kms.
27. Release Parking Brake.

I hope you enjoyed using our Drive Thru ATM services, Please have a pleasant day ahead. Tenkiu.

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Muahahahahhahahahahahaha!

4 comments:

Marccus said...

haha, nice one, wakaka

buttercup said...

LOL! thanks!

Esther said...

hello, not all girls are like that ok! sexist betul..

buttercup said...

LOL! yeah i know not all la. you're part of the gp tht don't do this.

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