It had been quite some years I'm away from home. Far away from home. Alone.
Staying alone, really alone, with only my laptop as my entertainment, something that keep me connected to my world back home, keeping me sane.
Though with the technology so advance that my family and I can contact almost everyday, but the lacking of touch, I somehow felt that "do-I-really-need-to-care-so-much" growing silently within.
Am I getting more selfish? Am I losing my sanity? Am I.... lost?
Who am I? Where do I come from? How should I be behaving?
When your family members failed to see what kind of situation you're in, I need to prevent that selfishness to keep on growing within.
I must keep my sanity in, as well as my family.
It could be a process that one must go through, and go through I must. Stay strong.
Showing posts with label Welcome To My Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Welcome To My Life. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
我还好吗？
相信，也没有几个人记得这边了。应该是一个讲秘密蛮不错的地方。
我，不明白为什么有贪得无厌的人。
我，不明白为什么有忘恩负义的人。
我，不明白为什么有目中无人的人。
。
。
。
。
我，不明白为什么我会在这边。希望阿弥陀佛给些指引，让我知道我该怎么继续走。
我，不明白为什么有贪得无厌的人。
我，不明白为什么有忘恩负义的人。
我，不明白为什么有目中无人的人。
。
。
。
。
我，不明白为什么我会在这边。希望阿弥陀佛给些指引，让我知道我该怎么继续走。
Sunday, May 22, 2011
A letter to the 16 year old me
**Highly inspired by ShinD, and hope I can express myself well enough here.
Dear 16-year-old me,
Hmmmm, life had been great and lucky stars had been shining on you recently. The 7A1B PMR results surely had put you through the skies and make you above everyone else. You have pretty strong and high confidence in yourself in almost everything.
Starting of the year had been great. You scored pretty well in the first Ujian Bulanan on this year and it DID put a lot of others in shocked --- that how can a dumb boy outcasted them. Your egoism had just grown. But they had never knew that, for all these, you are doing it for her.
One fine day, you were talking to your friends and they told you that Ee Von already have a boyfriend. It is quite a big shock for you and you did gave up studies quite a little since then (worry not, you will somehow tell her what you were thinking out of a sudden in a random chat over MSN in about 2010.. or is it 2011? Can't recal though, I'm older, remember?). Results weren't good, emotion was bad. But you will be kicking away those bad emotions fast, but hard, and then focus on something more. You have started to participate in many activities, and you will be gaining a lot of reputation (but not the results, okay?) and becoming more and more creditable.
Being a leader and given more responsiblities, you will grow into a better man but still, the egoism flies high. Everything, as long as not in the way you wanted, you think it's wrong. The lucky thing is, you're not 100% ego as you still put other people's feelings into considerations at times. You too are willing to teach people what you know. Keep that up. Knowledge is for sharing, not owned.
2004
Form 5 will be such a great year to be remembered and enjoyed! Even though with the hectic timetable and tuition schedules, you still haven't let go up on your Taekwondo. It's good to know you're keeping that up. Just for the record, in this year, EVERY SINGLE FRIDAY, you will be leaving the house about 6.30am in the morning and reach back home only about 1am, the DAY AFTER. Tiring, but fun!
2005
"Career" wise, you're doing pretty good, however, SPM came real quick and of course, you didn't do too well. Colleges came into parents' minds but because you don't know what you want, you want to give it a shot in STPM. You started off pretty well, and you will be elected as the Assistant Head Prefect of STAR.
You want to know how you've got yourself elected? I gave a thought of it a few years later and it came down to two very important possibilities, and of which, I think it's good to be continued to practice them throughout the entire of your life time.
1) During the probation, they will be asking if there's any volunteer would like to help everyone elses to do a name tag. Nobody will raise up their hand nor say anything at all. At this point of time, a thought came into your mind "Man! How come no one wants to do something?", and followed by you raising your hand. You did not gave much thought to it. It's a simple job anyway.
2) You were never late, as it has always been, and always will be.
During the promotion, you wanted to be in charge of PA. Names were annouced and Kin Wai took PA in the annoucement. List goes on and your name were never called. You were about to gave up and suddenly, your name were called. Mr Sazli said that "because you are willing to sacrifice and volunteered into doing something others don't want to do, AND, you are never late, we would be happy to appoint you as the Assistant Head Prefect". Those were some of the words that I think encouraged me(the you in the future) throughout my entire life.
Then you will soon become the President for Taekwondo Club, Chinese Language Society and... I can't remember. There are quite a few I think. During your tenure, you will be raising and aspire quite some people who worked with you. To me, I think it's a good sign that you teach people back what you've learnt from someone else. Do not own one knowledge. Shared it.
2007
Time flies by and STPM came. IF I'm not mistaken, you did not pass your Physics eventhough you're a Physics class students. You did quite well in MUET though. CSI came into mind, and you started to be interested in becoming a coroner.
However, you did not do your survey good enough. You simply picked UTAR and go in Biomedical Science and start from Foundation courses again as you don't know what to do. Like I said, stars had been shining upon you. It wasn't a big waste after all. UTAR is quite a good university that nurture people in their soft skills and you really picked up a lot from there. You will start to see too, how people in the world behave like. Trust me, this isn't anything, yet.
It was a hasty decision, you and a girl became "couple" over the MSN. But you never knew that you were just another float for her. If I'm not mistaken, it's a 27-day relationship and it ended with you ignoring her calls in the end because you have lost faith.
2008
Life goes on for the next few years and you did met quite a bunch of good people too! You did fell in love with another 2 girls at 2 different time, but you were never able to patch up with anyone of them. The second girl here actually turn you down before you even started speaking. You will be joining the Wataniah. You almost gave up on the 4th day itself and about to cry!!! But your senior David tells you that "if you can do what is being told here, you can do anything in the world". You took that advise and you really do your best. You graduated successfully from the 1-month-hectic army training and you got back to university again.
2009
You will be failing in your Metabolic Biochemistry twice. First one in Year One, and second time in Year 2. The second fail is which that started to change your life. PTPTN loan will be freezed. UTAR ain't providing a loan because you don't have external guarantor. Daddy wanted to loan the money from bank and put on you but you know that you can't waste more money.
You know that your heart is no longer there. Of course, you cannot take up all the money and waste up in the end getting nothing. You opt to give up this chance and let your siblings have it. Great choice. You are not wrong after all. You started working about one month later. Here is where you starting to see the REAL WORLD.
Your first boss is great. He will be teaching you quite a lot of things and of course, in return you did a lot of things too! Just that, the pay isn't too good, for real. You are living in KL and your starting pay is RM 1200. And you need to get a car because you will be doing sales. Company ain't giving you a car. It's okay. Your boss said that they will raise your salary to RM 1800 once after 3-month probation.
3 months passed and paycheck came in. It was RM 1400. You build up some great courage and confront your boss. You will be hearing this: "Oh, I am. I'm going to raise it to RM 1800 eventually. Where got people one shot jump so high one?", and you bought it. One year later it's still RM 1400. Your sales are actually quite good. So good that the boss too, eventually cancelled off your commissions. Stay calm.
You were disappointed but you can't do anything. You have got no degree to move on. Lucky stars are here again. You've got an offer to work in China.
2010
Trust me, this is the starting of my nightmare (yours too la of course!). For 1 year and 7 months, you're pretty much on your own because their culture isn't something you are expecting. Note that, there's this woman who tried to pull you into adultery but you're smart, and good enough to not do anything stupid. Besides than that, there's this girl who is nicked as "1986" too will fall in love with you. You know that it's not going to fruit and so you didn't give her any hopes.
2011
In the 9th years after 16 years old, you're finally 25 and you're going to stand at where I am now. You will be given a great opportunity to learn all the things you can't get from a textbook but, you seriously will be damn tired and work like there's no tomorrow.
Since China until now, you had been closing down on the inside, though you're STILL helping those who needed help, may it be a pair of listening years or reading eyes. You won't know where this is leading you, but at this point of time, you're feeling 35 and alone. Alone not as in without a girlfriend, but alone in this world.
At this very moment, I wished that I can go home and work there. I am very tired.
I want to cry.
p/s: 40-year old me, please write me a letter too, with love.
Dear 16-year-old me,
Hmmmm, life had been great and lucky stars had been shining on you recently. The 7A1B PMR results surely had put you through the skies and make you above everyone else. You have pretty strong and high confidence in yourself in almost everything.
Starting of the year had been great. You scored pretty well in the first Ujian Bulanan on this year and it DID put a lot of others in shocked --- that how can a dumb boy outcasted them. Your egoism had just grown. But they had never knew that, for all these, you are doing it for her.
One fine day, you were talking to your friends and they told you that Ee Von already have a boyfriend. It is quite a big shock for you and you did gave up studies quite a little since then (worry not, you will somehow tell her what you were thinking out of a sudden in a random chat over MSN in about 2010.. or is it 2011? Can't recal though, I'm older, remember?). Results weren't good, emotion was bad. But you will be kicking away those bad emotions fast, but hard, and then focus on something more. You have started to participate in many activities, and you will be gaining a lot of reputation (but not the results, okay?) and becoming more and more creditable.
Being a leader and given more responsiblities, you will grow into a better man but still, the egoism flies high. Everything, as long as not in the way you wanted, you think it's wrong. The lucky thing is, you're not 100% ego as you still put other people's feelings into considerations at times. You too are willing to teach people what you know. Keep that up. Knowledge is for sharing, not owned.
2004
Form 5 will be such a great year to be remembered and enjoyed! Even though with the hectic timetable and tuition schedules, you still haven't let go up on your Taekwondo. It's good to know you're keeping that up. Just for the record, in this year, EVERY SINGLE FRIDAY, you will be leaving the house about 6.30am in the morning and reach back home only about 1am, the DAY AFTER. Tiring, but fun!
2005
"Career" wise, you're doing pretty good, however, SPM came real quick and of course, you didn't do too well. Colleges came into parents' minds but because you don't know what you want, you want to give it a shot in STPM. You started off pretty well, and you will be elected as the Assistant Head Prefect of STAR.
You want to know how you've got yourself elected? I gave a thought of it a few years later and it came down to two very important possibilities, and of which, I think it's good to be continued to practice them throughout the entire of your life time.
1) During the probation, they will be asking if there's any volunteer would like to help everyone elses to do a name tag. Nobody will raise up their hand nor say anything at all. At this point of time, a thought came into your mind "Man! How come no one wants to do something?", and followed by you raising your hand. You did not gave much thought to it. It's a simple job anyway.
2) You were never late, as it has always been, and always will be.
During the promotion, you wanted to be in charge of PA. Names were annouced and Kin Wai took PA in the annoucement. List goes on and your name were never called. You were about to gave up and suddenly, your name were called. Mr Sazli said that "because you are willing to sacrifice and volunteered into doing something others don't want to do, AND, you are never late, we would be happy to appoint you as the Assistant Head Prefect". Those were some of the words that I think encouraged me(the you in the future) throughout my entire life.
Then you will soon become the President for Taekwondo Club, Chinese Language Society and... I can't remember. There are quite a few I think. During your tenure, you will be raising and aspire quite some people who worked with you. To me, I think it's a good sign that you teach people back what you've learnt from someone else. Do not own one knowledge. Shared it.
2007
Time flies by and STPM came. IF I'm not mistaken, you did not pass your Physics eventhough you're a Physics class students. You did quite well in MUET though. CSI came into mind, and you started to be interested in becoming a coroner.
However, you did not do your survey good enough. You simply picked UTAR and go in Biomedical Science and start from Foundation courses again as you don't know what to do. Like I said, stars had been shining upon you. It wasn't a big waste after all. UTAR is quite a good university that nurture people in their soft skills and you really picked up a lot from there. You will start to see too, how people in the world behave like. Trust me, this isn't anything, yet.
It was a hasty decision, you and a girl became "couple" over the MSN. But you never knew that you were just another float for her. If I'm not mistaken, it's a 27-day relationship and it ended with you ignoring her calls in the end because you have lost faith.
2008
Life goes on for the next few years and you did met quite a bunch of good people too! You did fell in love with another 2 girls at 2 different time, but you were never able to patch up with anyone of them. The second girl here actually turn you down before you even started speaking. You will be joining the Wataniah. You almost gave up on the 4th day itself and about to cry!!! But your senior David tells you that "if you can do what is being told here, you can do anything in the world". You took that advise and you really do your best. You graduated successfully from the 1-month-hectic army training and you got back to university again.
2009
You will be failing in your Metabolic Biochemistry twice. First one in Year One, and second time in Year 2. The second fail is which that started to change your life. PTPTN loan will be freezed. UTAR ain't providing a loan because you don't have external guarantor. Daddy wanted to loan the money from bank and put on you but you know that you can't waste more money.
You know that your heart is no longer there. Of course, you cannot take up all the money and waste up in the end getting nothing. You opt to give up this chance and let your siblings have it. Great choice. You are not wrong after all. You started working about one month later. Here is where you starting to see the REAL WORLD.
Your first boss is great. He will be teaching you quite a lot of things and of course, in return you did a lot of things too! Just that, the pay isn't too good, for real. You are living in KL and your starting pay is RM 1200. And you need to get a car because you will be doing sales. Company ain't giving you a car. It's okay. Your boss said that they will raise your salary to RM 1800 once after 3-month probation.
3 months passed and paycheck came in. It was RM 1400. You build up some great courage and confront your boss. You will be hearing this: "Oh, I am. I'm going to raise it to RM 1800 eventually. Where got people one shot jump so high one?", and you bought it. One year later it's still RM 1400. Your sales are actually quite good. So good that the boss too, eventually cancelled off your commissions. Stay calm.
You were disappointed but you can't do anything. You have got no degree to move on. Lucky stars are here again. You've got an offer to work in China.
2010
Trust me, this is the starting of my nightmare (yours too la of course!). For 1 year and 7 months, you're pretty much on your own because their culture isn't something you are expecting. Note that, there's this woman who tried to pull you into adultery but you're smart, and good enough to not do anything stupid. Besides than that, there's this girl who is nicked as "1986" too will fall in love with you. You know that it's not going to fruit and so you didn't give her any hopes.
2011
In the 9th years after 16 years old, you're finally 25 and you're going to stand at where I am now. You will be given a great opportunity to learn all the things you can't get from a textbook but, you seriously will be damn tired and work like there's no tomorrow.
Since China until now, you had been closing down on the inside, though you're STILL helping those who needed help, may it be a pair of listening years or reading eyes. You won't know where this is leading you, but at this point of time, you're feeling 35 and alone. Alone not as in without a girlfriend, but alone in this world.
At this very moment, I wished that I can go home and work there. I am very tired.
I want to cry.
p/s: 40-year old me, please write me a letter too, with love.
Monday, April 25, 2011
Saturday, February 26, 2011
A little updates from Thai.
Sawadeekap! Well, the update's a bit too slow but still, I finally have a little bit of time to keep my blog alive.
Had finally started working about 1 week. It's kind of okay still, but a lot of things to be learnt. The biggest problem of all is that, I can't speak Thai, yet. Like the saying goes, "The fastest way to pick up a foreign language is to get a local girlfriend".
**There are a few things I noticed in Thai & people.
1) I travelled to work in a "Song Diao", it's something like a small bus. No matter you're a guy or a girl, as long as you're carrying a child, you will be given seat even if the "Song Diao" is packed like sardine can.
2) They are actually very nice people to talk to.
3) So far I still can't converse in Thai but of the things I've heard in their conversation, you can hardly raise your voice when you're speaking Thai. It just "doesn't allow" you to raise your voice, in a way.
More updates coming soon, I hope. =)
My first time using the SMART Tunnel, thanks to Wei Chun.
1. First up, peeps that I've met during CNY.
2. I was on my way to Thailand already. Looking familiar?
3. The second or third day I'm in BKK, my cousin brother Thomas brought me to one of the mountain whereby 释迦牟尼佛 used to have His teaching. Look at those 4WD's. It started with a thrilling ride up the mountain (half of the mountain) and if you're not careful, any single time you can just bounce out from the back seats.
4. It started with prayers at the middle of the mountain, and it continued ALL THE WAY UP to the highest point.
5. I stopped by at side to catch this shot.
6.
7. A dimmed light shined the way for prayers.
8.
9. Due to some "inside connection", we got to go up the mountain once we arrived. HOWEVER, those other people, might have to wait half a day or more just to get a place to reach the mid-check point of the mountain. Thousands of people stopped at the side for a rest before continue hiking/decending.
10. 3/4 check point. And it's about 3am.
11. 7/8 Check point. This is where 释迦牟尼佛 sat back then.
12. The big frame of the right is actually a potraiture of Thai King.
13. After another 800m hike, I've finally decending. It was about 5am. Look at the crowd.
14.
15. On the decending path, there are stalls selling lotteries.
16. Break of dawn.
17. About 6.30am, we had finally reached our transportation again. Look at the tip top of the mountain on the left, there was where I were.
18. This, is the evening view from my office @ 6th floor.
19. I was placed to stay with my colleague, Aod for a few days before getting my accomodation ready. Sunset view from his balcony.
20. Still, I missed this most. =)
First time I'm seeing Waiters & Waitress dancing during peak hours in restaurant. MK Restaurant is a big brand in Thailand.
Had finally started working about 1 week. It's kind of okay still, but a lot of things to be learnt. The biggest problem of all is that, I can't speak Thai, yet. Like the saying goes, "The fastest way to pick up a foreign language is to get a local girlfriend".
**There are a few things I noticed in Thai & people.
1) I travelled to work in a "Song Diao", it's something like a small bus. No matter you're a guy or a girl, as long as you're carrying a child, you will be given seat even if the "Song Diao" is packed like sardine can.
2) They are actually very nice people to talk to.
3) So far I still can't converse in Thai but of the things I've heard in their conversation, you can hardly raise your voice when you're speaking Thai. It just "doesn't allow" you to raise your voice, in a way.
More updates coming soon, I hope. =)
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Monday Blue on A Saturday Night
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Yeap, I did it again. It says "Monday Blue".
Yeap, I did it again. It says "Monday Blue".
1.
2.
3. Behold of the Monday Blue!
Saturday, July 17, 2010
A lesson learnt
Learnt something today. Moments ago in fact.
Sometimes, we should really be quiet when we have the slightest mood swing. Word kills.
I'm sorry. =(
Sometimes, we should really be quiet when we have the slightest mood swing. Word kills.
I'm sorry. =(
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Taekwondo is still burning strong in me
I think I have two passions. Two passions that are different from the surface but deep inside both, there are similarities.
Today, I am going to combine both of these passions and made it one. Let's talk less and present to you, Taekwondo and photography. *HAHA*
These similarities are: Courtesy, Integrity, Perserverance, Self-Control and Indomitable Spirit. (Also, Tenants of Taekwondo)
Behind the scene thoughts:
It really had been 3 years since I put up this uniform and really train in it. It was an important part of my life. Through a fight, once understand himself better. Throughout my Taekwondo journey, I had learnt a lot of things. Many things that we don't learn from textbooks.
I really hope that I will have the chance to start my training back again. I love martial arts.
p/s: I really don't quite like self-potrait because, I have problem getting the focusing right, and angle also a big problem since I need to mount my flash gun and camera on my tripods. =(
Today, I am going to combine both of these passions and made it one. Let's talk less and present to you, Taekwondo and photography. *HAHA*
1. I like to shoot with this kind of lightings
2. As you can see, the space is very limited. I can't crop of the left part or else it'll kill the feeling.
3. Back Fist
4. Spear
5. Tiger Stance
6. Chop. Yeah I know it doesn't look like it. LOL.
7. Back First from another angle.
8. This chop better or the previous one in (6)?
9. Now, this is my favourite shot of the night. Even though it's not a good kick. Not a good angle, but I like how the light landed on my feet, uniform and my face. This is the only shot out of 88 shots that satisfy me.
10. Jumping too low, not enough time to raise my other leg. Space is the problem.
11. Turning kick. If I did my warm up, I think I can kick higher than this.
12. Trying to do a high side kick but failed. I can't remember if it's me moving too fast or too slow that my leg haven't stretch/retract, OR, I really need to start training again. LOL.
13. Oh, I'm on my daily routine to do push ups since I didn't do much exercise here in China. I did 30 push ups one shot, daily. In this position....... not. LOL.
These similarities are: Courtesy, Integrity, Perserverance, Self-Control and Indomitable Spirit. (Also, Tenants of Taekwondo)
Behind the scene thoughts:
It really had been 3 years since I put up this uniform and really train in it. It was an important part of my life. Through a fight, once understand himself better. Throughout my Taekwondo journey, I had learnt a lot of things. Many things that we don't learn from textbooks.
I really hope that I will have the chance to start my training back again. I love martial arts.
p/s: I really don't quite like self-potrait because, I have problem getting the focusing right, and angle also a big problem since I need to mount my flash gun and camera on my tripods. =(
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
背井离乡，是一个很好的成长过程。
才发现，自己已经很久没有照过相... 有心情的时候，老天，雨一直下；没心情的时候，阳光，撒尽天下。 摄友也无影无踪，真是扫兴！
突然间，灵感一来，想拍下我生活中的一小部分与大家分享。
*这张是较早前拍摄到的。当时刚刚放工回家，突然间眼前一片雪白！夏天当下，哪儿来的雪啊？原来,是一群臭小子玩了宝丽龙又不收拾的画面。
突然间，灵感一来，想拍下我生活中的一小部分与大家分享。
1. 早晨的阳光，柔柔的叫我起床。（太阳五点出头就挂在天上啦！）
2. 看出窗外，也看到独自站在一角默默守候的铁公鸡。
3. 走到阳台，望着窗外的色彩。一个美好早上的开始。
4. 坐在电脑前面，突然注意到，连纸巾都要耍浪漫。
5. 也时不时，看到在后面的称，跑去称称，还好没过百。
6. Facebook 是最佳良伴。除了我和我自己，Facebook就是第三者。
7. 花了近三百零吉的日文课本，岁月已逝，也只读了5%。
8.最近刚买的《货币战争2：金权天下》。老板介绍的书。他说，只要用心读完这本书，我就比平常人更高一层了。希望我能实实在在的读完它。
9. 这个月尾，将会是我在这里打工一周年纪念。还会继续在这里打拼吗？这个答案，只有老天知道。
10. 大家渐渐的疏远了... 但，你们都还好吧？保持联络！
*这张是较早前拍摄到的。当时刚刚放工回家，突然间眼前一片雪白！夏天当下，哪儿来的雪啊？原来,是一群臭小子玩了宝丽龙又不收拾的画面。
背井离乡，是一个很好的成长过程。水，亦能载舟，亦能覆舟。就看你，怎么去理解与深入。
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Married For Four Days!
I had a dream yesterday. A dream that I shocked myself LOL.
I dreamt that I woke up in my dream, seeing a girl lying beside me. I were married! But sadly, I can't get to see her face clear enough.
I only know that she's a Malaysian Chinese, and her parents have a farm back in the kampung.
I was married for FOUR DAYS already in that dream. HAHAHAHAHA. WTFness.
Now, which of you is the girl, please step forward.
I dreamt that I woke up in my dream, seeing a girl lying beside me. I were married! But sadly, I can't get to see her face clear enough.
I only know that she's a Malaysian Chinese, and her parents have a farm back in the kampung.
I was married for FOUR DAYS already in that dream. HAHAHAHAHA. WTFness.
Now, which of you is the girl, please step forward.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Lost...
I had been lost for a very very long time. Possibly about nine years already.
Everyday, I wake up from my bed, tidy up, go to work, come back, online, sleep. And history repeats itself the next day.
After being here for 10 months, I realised I'm still pretty much who I am before I left Malaysia. I find my peace of mind here in the world wide web.
Should I really open up a studio here in China? Or back in Malaysia?
Everyday, I wake up from my bed, tidy up, go to work, come back, online, sleep. And history repeats itself the next day.
After being here for 10 months, I realised I'm still pretty much who I am before I left Malaysia. I find my peace of mind here in the world wide web.
Should I really open up a studio here in China? Or back in Malaysia?
Or.... someone can enlighten me on the web?
*Probably it is just the time of the month again..... =.=
Sunday, April 11, 2010
I DID IT! I AM PROUD OF MYSELF TODAY!
Today, I am proud to tell you that, I AM PROUD OF MYSELF!
The story:
These few days I had been starting to push myself to move my ass more rather than just sitting in front of my laptop and Facebook 24/7. My weight had been really pushing it to the edge of 100kg already. LOL. A few days back, I weight about 98.5kg. Hmmmm... THAT'S A LOT.
So I started a little bit of exercise like push ups. It had been at least 2 years I never did any push ups, so I thought, giving it 15 at a time for a few days should be good. IT IS DIFFICULT.. after resting so many years not moving a muscle. I always almost give up when it reaches 10. But the inner coach screaming at me, yelling at me and asked me to finished it. I did.
Today morning, like usual, I did another 15. Suddenly, I saw ray of light shining into my house! It had been daysssssss I missed sunlight as the weather here is kind of terrible! This is it. I am going for hiking at Baiyun Mountain! My initial plan was to hike until half (so called half way) and snap some pictures then go home and rest.
I had been staying here for almost 10 months and I had NEVER CLIMBED TO THE PEAK of that mountain. I believe it's about 800m or higher but lesser than 1000m in height. There's no map. No altitude sign. People said it's not too high. So I thought to myself, "Why not give it a try?".
And together with me, I brought my wife along (about 5kg in total) and myself (98.5kg) and I started my hiking bearing about 103.5kg on my foot! The last time I went hiking to such altitude was back in my Wataniah training and this one, is really random and no mental preparation at all.
I don't know which way to follow. I don't know how high is it. I don't know HOW FAR is it. I climbed and climbed. I hiked and hiked. Many times, I almost give up and wanted to turn back. Then I remembered when I was back in the boot camp. How I were pushed and tortured but remained confident and never give up. I continued.
On the way up, I met some hikers as well, I asked for direction and they always tell me this: "Oh, very near only. Another 2 curves you're gonna be there!". But thank god they "lied" to me. LOL. It is NOT AS NEAR AS IMAGINED.
I started approximately 0930 hours and I reached the peak at 1111 hours sharp. I did it non-stop and it's really a long long hike for a person like me who had not been in training to do this kind of hiking. I can only motivate and motivate myself all way up the road.
Finally, I am standing right at the peak of the mountain. I feel that, it is not a waste that I went for Wataniah training that trained me not to give up no matter what; and, I was wearing my Taekwondo pants too. It gives me another boost of energy.
I AM PROUD OF MYSELF TODAY! Even though I might not feel my legs tomorrow morning. XD
The story:
These few days I had been starting to push myself to move my ass more rather than just sitting in front of my laptop and Facebook 24/7. My weight had been really pushing it to the edge of 100kg already. LOL. A few days back, I weight about 98.5kg. Hmmmm... THAT'S A LOT.
So I started a little bit of exercise like push ups. It had been at least 2 years I never did any push ups, so I thought, giving it 15 at a time for a few days should be good. IT IS DIFFICULT.. after resting so many years not moving a muscle. I always almost give up when it reaches 10. But the inner coach screaming at me, yelling at me and asked me to finished it. I did.
Today morning, like usual, I did another 15. Suddenly, I saw ray of light shining into my house! It had been daysssssss I missed sunlight as the weather here is kind of terrible! This is it. I am going for hiking at Baiyun Mountain! My initial plan was to hike until half (so called half way) and snap some pictures then go home and rest.
I had been staying here for almost 10 months and I had NEVER CLIMBED TO THE PEAK of that mountain. I believe it's about 800m or higher but lesser than 1000m in height. There's no map. No altitude sign. People said it's not too high. So I thought to myself, "Why not give it a try?".
And together with me, I brought my wife along (about 5kg in total) and myself (98.5kg) and I started my hiking bearing about 103.5kg on my foot! The last time I went hiking to such altitude was back in my Wataniah training and this one, is really random and no mental preparation at all.
I don't know which way to follow. I don't know how high is it. I don't know HOW FAR is it. I climbed and climbed. I hiked and hiked. Many times, I almost give up and wanted to turn back. Then I remembered when I was back in the boot camp. How I were pushed and tortured but remained confident and never give up. I continued.
On the way up, I met some hikers as well, I asked for direction and they always tell me this: "Oh, very near only. Another 2 curves you're gonna be there!". But thank god they "lied" to me. LOL. It is NOT AS NEAR AS IMAGINED.
I started approximately 0930 hours and I reached the peak at 1111 hours sharp. I did it non-stop and it's really a long long hike for a person like me who had not been in training to do this kind of hiking. I can only motivate and motivate myself all way up the road.
Finally, I am standing right at the peak of the mountain. I feel that, it is not a waste that I went for Wataniah training that trained me not to give up no matter what; and, I was wearing my Taekwondo pants too. It gives me another boost of energy.
This is the proof I'm standing on the peak of the mountain and the proof why this is the only picture I took today. LOOK AT THE HAZE!
I AM PROUD OF MYSELF TODAY! Even though I might not feel my legs tomorrow morning. XD
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
This Is It.
This is it.
I had got some inspiration last night. And this is where I am heading to now. I need to let go what I need to let go, and concentrate on what I need to focus.
Wish me luck.
I had got some inspiration last night. And this is where I am heading to now. I need to let go what I need to let go, and concentrate on what I need to focus.
Wish me luck.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Camwhore V2.0
As you can see, I am very bored and very very bored. I don't know what to do because I ain't got books to read here, too. So, I suddenly got an idea on what to do and, enjoy.
Hope you guys will appreciate these few pictures. Especially the last one.
Please do comment and then, you MAY laugh now.
Hope you guys will appreciate these few pictures. Especially the last one.
Please do comment and then, you MAY laugh now.
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